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Actual newspaper headlines.... 
(August 2, 2024)
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers 
Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted 
Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case 
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents 
Farmer Bill Dies in House 
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms 
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? 
Stud Tires Out 
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over 
Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again 
Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead 
Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim 
Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66 
Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax 
Miners Refuse to Work after Death 
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant 
Stolen Painting Found by Tree 
Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies 
Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter 
Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years 
Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One 
Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84 
War Dims Hope for Peace 
If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While 
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures 
Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide 
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge 
Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead 
Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge 
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group 
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