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Actual instruction lables found on products... 
(August 5, 2024)
ON A HAIR DRYER:  
Do not use while sleeping. 
ON A BAG OF FRITOS:  
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. 
ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP:  
Directions: Use like regular soap. 
ON A FROZEN DINNER:  
Serving suggestion: Defrost. 
ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP:  
Fits one head. 
ON TESCO'S TIRAMISU DESERT:  
Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.) 
ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING:  
Product will be hot after heating.
 
ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON:  
Do not iron clothes on body. 
ON BOOTS CHILDRENS' COUGH MEDICINE:  
Do not drive car or operate machinery. 
ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID):  
Warning: may cause drowsiness. 
ON A KITCHEN KNIFE:  
Warning keep out of children. 
ON A STRING OF CHRISTMAS LIGHTS: 
For indoor or outdoor use only. 
ON A FOOD PROCESSOR:  
Not to be used for the other use. 
ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS:  
Warning: contains nuts. 
ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS:  
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. 
ON A CHAINSAW:  
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. 
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